Tuesday: Guilt, Anxiety, and Breast Pumps — What’s Up with Parenting?

A Week of Little Thoughts About Life

I have no idea what breast pumps are like now, but in 2003, when I had my first baby, I rented my pump from a place called “Kangaroo Kids” and it was like a medieval torture device. In a memory that could bring me to tears with both laughter and pain, I remember trying to find free offices to pump in during breaks from my home hospice visits. There was not a little humiliation, sticking my boobs in this thing in somebody else’s office with the door locked at 11 am, turn on the electrical switch and being milked like a cow while listening to the loud, rhythmic, industrial pump. All while trying to relax so that I could produce 8 oz. of milk. It was stressful for me and cumbersome. I weaned both my kids by 6 months old, privately knowing it was the best decision, but publicly feeling that I needed to apologize for that.

As a therapist, I listen to other people’s struggles with parenting from cradle on through. I am witness to the changing pressures of young parenthood — since 2003, it seems there are intensified social pressures and maybe some scientific or pop scientific pressure (certainly among white, middle to upper class women) to have natural childbirth, to breastfeed longer, to use cloth diapers, and make sure food is organic.